Okay, so I took my mother to have hip replacement surgery, an outpatient procedure, and picked her up. Outpatient surgery, also known as ambulatory surgery is surgery that doesn’t require an overnight hospital stay. It hasn’t been one full day yet, and she is already being her normal crazy, silly self and scaring me every 10 minutes. As a matter of fact, she didn’t let 10 minutes go by from when I got her home before she started her shenanigans lol. If you keep reading, you’ll find out 3 tips for taking care of a parent after outpatient surgery and find out more about my experience.
Let me give you a little background on my mother. She doesn’t sit still even though she likes to fake like she does. She is the original fly girl and life of the party, and I mean life of the party still to this day. She threw a party and charged an entry fee to raise the funds for my first car. She raised over $4000. Quarantining was probably one of the hardest things she’s had to do because it forced her to be still and she couldn’t be around friends. Her social life is probably better than mine lol. Oh, and I have to mention that she’s a dancing machine lol… which is part of the reason she needed hip replacement surgery. Those who follow my personal Instagram account or snapchat see me post her dancing all the time lol. She even cheered (professional cheerleading teams are pretty much dance teams) for the Washington Bullets (the name of the NBA team before the Wizards) and the Washington Redskins (currently going by the Washington Football Team). In 2018 she danced at a Washington Wizard’s game for some Bullets players’ alumni presentation. My sister and I trained her, and she did awesome. Even then she was experiencing some hip pain, but still wanted to perform.
You can also view it on TheLuxeDocs Instagram page –> instagram.com/theluxedocs <– under the “Get Active” story.
Fast forward to now, once again, she’s being forced to sit still until she’s fully recovered. Not completely still because the doctor’s orders were for her to do things on her own, and it’s driving me crazy. When we were first waiting in the waiting room, she was talking about how she was going to be swinging her leg in all different directions once she healed while swinging her arm back and forth across her chest, up and down, and around in circles. I’m like “Ma, stop people are looking over here.” When I picked her up, she was showing and telling me about all the new technology, and just seeing the patch over where the incision was had me queasy. Mind you, it wasn’t even any blood on the patch. She tells me, “girl you in the wrong field.” I’m a pharmacist, not a surgeon. I don’t see all of that during the course of my day. I get her home and that’s when the shenanigans start. She picked up her cane and started walking with it. I’m yelling no. Then she starts talking about how the nurses said she’s advanced, so she needs to walk regular with the walker instead of the method they teach, which she has been doing, but it hasn’t even been a whole 24 hours and she wants to play. Then her best friend came over to chill and eat with her. She gets off the walker and starts doing something silly saying she doesn’t need it. All the while I’m holding my breath. This is what I have to deal with lol. I am happy she’s in good spirits. She was upset when the surgery was pushed back due to Covid, and she was so excited on the way to get it. Meanwhile, I was nervous and couldn’t sleep until I found out she was out of surgery. I guess I need to call my sister and give her a heads up because she’s got the next shift and doesn’t know what she’s got coming her way lol.
3 Tips for Taking Care of a Parent After Outpatient Surgery:
1. Relax!
Your parent has made it out of surgery, so the scary part is over. The doctor has left instructions with your parent or yourself, and you can always reach back out if you have any questions or concerns. Most outpatient surgeries today want the patient to be able to do things on their own, so let your parent do just that. I felt a type of way because nothing was ever explained to me. I was even let back into the preop area to see her off and still didn’t get a run down from anyone. I guess I should’ve asked. They might have felt like their patient was confident in her understanding of everything and that’s all that was needed. So, all the instructions were given to me through my mother, who was the patient, and I just had to trust her word on everything. Remember, you can always get information in person or reach back out for any questions you may have. Don’t ever feel like you have to assume anything.
2. Make sure your parent fully understands the recovery process, medication, and any devices
The doctor’s orders were for her to do things herself. She had to be able to walk out of the hospital in order to be discharged. So even though I’m still holding my breath (it hasn’t been 24 hours yet) and watching her like a hawk, I let her do her thing. Some cases may call for gradual independence. Try to gauge where they are without pushing them too much or allowing themselves to do so. They may also need a little encouragement to do things on their own depending on their mood or confidence in their ability to do so.
Make sure your parent understands the importance of the home exercises or physical therapy, especially if it is unguided or independent. It is important for the mobility of the area the surgery was done.
Help your parent organize and understand the medications they are taking. Whether they will use a pill organizer or keep them in their original containers, organization is important. Also, the schedule because this new set of medications will be added to the original set your parent may have been taking prior to surgery and certain medications from the original set may not need to be started back right away. My biggest pet peeve with pill organizers is that patients sometimes don’t know what they’re taking or what it does; just that they’ve taken the medications in that day’s box. However, I do realize that depending on the patient population, it is more important that the medications are being taken than them fully understanding why. Technology has also made taking medications easier. There are aps that allow you to not only schedule the medications to alarm when you’re supposed to take them but show the picture and name so you know what you’re taking and remind you about refills. The same goes for medical equipment. They sent my mother home with a leg cryotherapy cuff.
Last but certainly not least, it’s important your parent knows the signs of possible complications. Knowing this information will enable them to inform you or someone else of what’s going on and have it checked out early.
3. Be Supportive and as Available as Possible
It is important to create a balance of support and independence. You don’t want to aggravate your parent by trying to do everything, but you also don’t want to remove yourself completely. My mother won’t let me help her much, but still wanted me to stay the night. She wouldn’t let me bring her food from the kitchen but called me into her room to pick up her pen she dropped, and that’s only because she couldn’t get it with her grabber device.
Looking after a parent can be difficult. It is a lot to add on to one’s everyday responsibilities. If it ever gets too overwhelming, reach out for help from friends, family, and/or home health aides. You can easily look up home health aides on the internet, but I recommend you start with discussing it with your healthcare provider. That way you can be made aware of all your options and even pathways that may take insurance or provide help with payment. Remain patient and supportive and reach out for help if needed.
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